Bra fitting help » Center wrinkling - fit problem?
Curvy Kate » Bardot Balcony Bra (SG3101) » 30E 30:6
Issue resolved
Just wanted more opinions
Original problem
This bra has more wrinkling than I prefer, but I'm looking for opinions? Is it a bad fit? Maybe an issue im missing? Or just minor wrinkles? It's not as seamless under clothes as i prefer but thats more the cup seams and embrodiery showing than the wrinkles.
I love how it looks in the side and angle shots, but then the front shot.. I'm torn.
The wires a bit wide and I'm getting a bit more armpit chub than usual from the low wings and shorter cups. For reference I tried it in a 28F first and the cups were too short and closed on top. This bra has slightly taller cups so that problem is better now.
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Suggestions (2)
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helpful
It looks like a fairly decent fit to me. I think you do have the best size here--while it may be a half inch or so deeper than you require, given your tallish, sloping upper breast shape, this particular cup is not going to be open enough at the top if you size down. I actually think it is quite nice from an aesthetic standpoint... the purple lace overlay softens the black a bit and overall it is a nice color combination for your skin tone. This being said, it's obviously not a perfect match for your natural shape, so between that and the fact that it shows through clothes, if you're feeling 'meh' about it, I definitely would understand if you didn't wanna keep it!
Updated on August 15, 2016 Flag this
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Arabella is very pretty too! yes I am not sure how it fits in your size range... worth trying though!
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helpful
You didnt add a stretched band measurement, but I'm wondering if the band is a little too tight? That can warp the shape of the bra a bit. Try an extender and see if it fits any better. Sometimes bras need an extender for the first few weeks until they stretch out
Updated on August 15, 2016 Flag this
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The band doesn't feel tight, but the extender is always a good idea. Might help the wings cut in less at least. I'l measure the band and try it out tonight!
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Wow, I know its silly, but I really appreciated your comment. Someone down-voted my suggestion. I always find that disheartening and a little nerve-wracking.
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Some people are religiously attached to the Band Must Be As Tight As You Can Bear principle so they get butthurt if you even talk about the band ;-)
In this case I'm not sure if it is too snug or not. Is your loose measurement taken after inhaling (lungs full) or just relaxed natural posture?
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Not me - I've been helped many times by the suggestion of an extender :)
I'm never quite sure how to breathe when I'm doing measurements haha! Just double checked and will update them.. loose is 31", but gets as big as 33" when I inhale, comfortable is 29.5-30", tight is around 28".
The Bardot is pretty stretchy and almost stretches to 32", so that's definitely not the problem. An extender makes it ride up a bit.
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Yes it sounds like you are in the loose 30, snug 32 range.
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Maybe it's because you're constantly telling everyone to size up in the band and down in the cup even if they obviously don't need to be in a bigger band. Or a smaller cup. A 29" underbust should never wear a 34 band, for example. I'll happily recommend people to size up one if they really need to, but there's a reason BTB and ABTF don't promote the +4/+5 measuring!
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I don't recall melifish telling people to do that with any regularity lcl0706 . And some specific bras are off the charts tight. My nonwired vintage style bullety type bras are usually 34s because they fit like longlines. Or for instance I had a black Wacoal Embrace Lace where I honestly could not even close the 32 no matter the cup size and my comfortable underbust is 29.3" So yes it's very rare but not a NEVER thing and if I saw someone with my measurements who likewise had a freakishly small-running 32 on that looked way tight in the band, I would have no problem telling her to try sizing up. I think it's very important not to be doctrinaire either way.
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Actually wendybien I remember when I was confused by melifish telling me to go up in the band and down in the cup several people mentioned to look at her past posts. 95%of the time she's saying your band is too small and the cup is too big. She had me confused and in tears. Even you didn't agree that I needed to go down a cup and up in the band. The band was riding up slightly and she still said the band was too small. It's all she says and it's hurtful and confusing sometimes. Yes sometimes people do need to go up in the band and down in the cup. However, some people are in between cups. The slight gaping is better than quadding out for me so it's the route I prefer. Everyone is different and needs to find what is comfortable for them. Not add several inches to their UB because frankly she comes across as just hating on small banded girls.
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I like how you say "even you, wendybien" like I'm part of some axis of +4 evil :-P I'm perfecting my movie supervillain costume as we speak.
I never said melifish was an oracle who is right all the time. We are separate people, don't know each other outside of Bratabase and even here we have had plenty of disagreements!
I just think you all are jumping on her unfairly, because (a) it is true that A LOT of brafitting newbies do fit requests with band either still too big (they think if their loose UB is 34.1 it's fine to wear a 34 even though comfortable UB is barely over 30") or too small (wearing as tight as they can tolerate instead of as tight as needed to avoid ride-up) and (b) if someone has a particular pet peeve about a specific issue, in this case overtight bands being compensated by sizing up in the cup, those are the fit requests they will tend to choose to respond to. So the fact that this is often her advice doesn't mean she doesn't know anything or has nothing else to offer. Does it mean you have to agree or that it's always the right advice, no, of course not. But does it mean you should attack her personally and make absurd accusations that she wants everyone to do +4, no. She has said many times her entire IRL workday as a brafitter is spent telling people to size DOWN in the band and UP in the cup.
And finally accusing someone who does this of hating on small banded girls is really way over the line. I have never ever EVER seen melifish say anything mean about a thin or petite body and many of her responses to try a larger band have been directed to people who were definitely at least in the medium-fluffy body size range and a mid to large band size i.e. they were wearing a 36 and she was suggesting 38.
If folks don't like a person's posting style, and it's true melifish's tone can often be critical and blunt, that is valid, but I think it's unfair and overdramatic to accuse the person of always having terrible advice, being a one trick pony, being prejudiced against certain body types, etc. etc.
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lcl0706 I give lots of fit advice on here saying different things depending on the problems presented. Unfortunately you're right, I do sound like a broken record sometimes, and believe me i am just as tired of saying it as you are of hearing it. This is because I think a lot of women are given poor advice, i guess mostly from r/abtf? -- recommending a supertight band for everyone. Some people do need a supertight band. Most don't.
I would never recommend a 34 band for a 29" UB, and I never have. To the contrary, I spend all day at my job trying to get women with 29" UBs out of their 36s and into 30s and 32s. I recently recommended someone with a 31" UB stick with 32 bands (as opposed to 30s) and told her not to rule out 34s, because she has a small cup (and therefore needs a less tight band) and some bands run tight -- bra sizing is 100% not standardized and one brand's 32 is another's 36. I think that's what you're referring to.
I actually think I comment less on band tightness and more on cup size being too big. This is what I see as the real problem, but it is often caused by the supertight bands. A supertight band tends to cause two things:
a) the cups are held too closely to the chest and cause quadding in the correct cup size
b) discomfort due to wires poking or general tightness.
The solution that is most often presented in the English-speaking online brafitting community is to go up in the cup to solve these problems (or to go Comexim and customize until you effectively have a smaller cup). But going up in the cup more than the volume you really need actually creates more problems than it solves. The cups become too tall, wide, and/or deep. The strap junction chafes the armpit. The cups can't support properly when they're too big. A feedback loop thing happens where women notice the poor fit and then go even bigger in the cup and smaller in the band to try to correct the problem. This doesn't work. Going up in the band doesn't always work, either! Sometimes a bra is just not meant for a particular body. One limitation we face online is that we tend to recommend the same brands over and over (for various reasons); they just don't work for everyone.girl333 The way your bra fits in your blog post is not a standard fit. The Comexim wires, usually so very narrow, are curving way toward your back. I would not recommend that fit for anyone who asked me. However, it is YOUR bra, and if that's what's comfortable to you, do it up!!! I mean it. Fit is individual and what is comfortable for most doesn't work for everybody. I only give advice to those who ask for it. Just because I may be in the minority in my opinion doesn't mean it's not valuable.
However, to say that I hate on small banded women is just confusing and frankly offensive. I give the advice I give irrespective of band size, though it is my experience that women with very little padding need looser bands, and I'm not the first one to say that.
A weird vibe I get sometimes is that it is somehow offensive to suggest that anyone needs a looser band or smaller cup. That weirds me out, folks. We come in all different sizes.
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FWIW, with my measurements given and experience I think that 90% of the time a 32DD fits worse than a 30E on me. The bands are much too big generally. And I have tried many 32DD bras since they're easier to find. I prefer a 30E with a true to size or even tighter band so i can wear it out slower. So it isn't the best advice for me personally, but I can see why the recommendation is given based on my loose measurements.
Still, it's also been a helpful comment in cases where the band was too tight and the stretch was making the cups wider and more shallow.
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lol wendy i started writing my comment a long time ago and just hit 'add comment' so didn't see yours.
I won't be in a +4 axis of evil with you. but i WILL be in a "plus 0, 1, 2, 3 or maybe even 4 or -1 axis of evil" with you.
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Yes, annabellynn in your case it was just the loose measurement that was open to interpretation. I don't think the cups were being pulled out here with the Bardot though :-)
melifish my algebra is rusty but I think with all those numbers we may be more of a blob than an axis :-P
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melifish i have pectus carinatum and excavatum. My actual ribcage is very curved. The start of my ribcage is much closer to my back. The wires aren't curving or distorting at all. It's the shape of my body. Even a 32" does that on me. I have. 28" Comexim it fits the same. I have 24" UB if I'm not a 26" band I don't know who is
Also the same women you say often came from bigger band sizes. It's not offensive to suggest bigger bands. It is offensive to only do so -
and just to jump in here . . . i only sometimes say to check an extender so you can see if thats the issue or not. I never said, buy a bigger bra. I tried an extender when I was having pain with my envy . . . it worked better if I stuffed it under the wire than if i wore it where it is supposed to go. but it was still worth a couple of minutes to double check, i thought.
blobbity blob.
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wendybien i think you're over generalizing your hate in the wrong direction. I'm just providing valid insight as to why people hate on melifish. I never said it like its an evil axis. I'm just saying she always suggests going down a cup and up in the band 9.5/10. After her comments I refused to do another fit check. She's harsh and doesn't see the other point of view. It's one thing to only suggest smaller bands, but it's another to suggest the other way too. I never said she made hateful comments towards thin girls, but she does seem to think sub 28 bands don't exist and that is hating no matter how you look at it.
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I'm sorry, I guess I'm just too old to sling around "hate" in the casual way you seem to do. I'm appalled that you support "hating on" someone. I'm sorry you think I do. I do not hate anyone here, nor do I ever make hateful comments to people here, and I defy you to produce a link to somewhere where I've said something hateful.
I have never seen melifish claiming that nobody needs bands under 28?! She's not blind, she can see there are people with ribcages 23, 24, 25 inches around. I think you are being seriously unreasonable.
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Holy crap, a +4 axis of evil? Hahahaha. Please. I've told plenty of people in my day that they should size up in the band. I'm alllll about wearing the loosest band that provides sufficient support. I'm not going to apologize that in my case, that's a 28 band, or in Girl333's case, that's a 26 band, or that 30 bands exist and that 24 bands exist. People of all shapes and sizes exist, and yeah there are women out there who need smaller than 28 bands. There are also bloggers and members right here on BTB that need to size UP in the band and I've said so!
What I AM tired of, however, is seeing melifish tell what seems like every single damn person they need to size up in the band. And I'm tired of the Comexim wire BS towards Girl333. Melifish is not in anybody else's body. Rib flares are a real thing. Some people's ribcages are shaped funny and wires don't lay the way they "should." And yes, I was floored to see a 34C suggested on a recent fit request for a member with a 29" underbust and CLEARLY NOT 34C BOOBS in any way shape or form. It's like she was blind to the idea that hey, maybe the cup shape is wrong. Sometimes cups can be too shallow and with the Maddie in the case I'm remembering, that was the real issue.
There's a real impression of "reverse letterphobia" going on or bandphobia or something. Sometimes that is the case with a user, but not always. Girl333 has every right to feel attacked when the suggestions she's been given in particular are ludicrous. The feeling is compounded by the fact that most major manufacturers refuse to produce smaller than a 30 band or do so after they've thrown a baby fit (ahem, Ewa) or charge extra for it. Like when you know that's your band size, you shouldn't have to defend yourself for it.
I also believe the larger your breasts are, the more likely it is you'll need a snugger band for support. Not a TIGHT band that is your BTT, but closer to +0 or maybe +1 of your snug measurement. You bet if I see a fit check of a 30" ribcage wearing a 28 band with distortion in the cups I'm gonna say hey try a 30 or a 32. But if there's no band measurements given and the OP doesn't say the band feels tight and/or I don't see cup distortion, I'm not going to assume it's the band.
I can see a 29" UB wearing a band that stretches to 30-32. You go for your +2 if that's appropriate in your situation. My 12 year old stepdaughter wears a 30D-DD even though she measures a 28DD-E. She doesn't need the 28 band for support.
I can't, however, see a 29" UB wearing a 34 unless it's a seriously undersized 34 band. That was kinda the last straw of craziness to me. Then we're back at +5 which is what the whole well-fitted bra community is trying to obliterate. If you have to size up 4-5" in the band, it's not a band problem it's a cup shape or size problem. Otherwise we might as well send everyone back to the matrix and bras that fit like sh*t.
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So because melifish has been off the mark on various occasions (which I'm sure has NEVER happened to any of you...) she is a hater, and because I have some old school wirefrees that seriously measure 31" stretched out despite being labeled 34 I have the wrong cup size or the wrong cup shape?
How is Ewa's ridiculousness melifish's fault?
I know one specific poster in a small band, small cup size range who I see giving very consistently off the mark advice to ladies who are larger in both cup size and overall body size. She is a prolific commenter. She is also sometimes argumentative. Are you saying I should I start following her around and trashing her and calling her a body fascist fat-shamer?! Instead of assuming she's just trying to help and, hey, sometimes people are wrong?
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melifish, I'd just like to say that I think you are mistaken about r/ABTF consistently recommending 'supertight' bands, as I don't see this at all. Quite often, it is recommended that someone might be more comfortable wearing one band size larger than that suggested by the ABTF calculator, particularly when their snug underbust measurement is the same as their estimated band size - i.e. someone with a 28 underbust and not much squish on their ribs would probably be recommended a 30 band.
My snug underbust is 29 inches and my tight underbust is less than 27 inches, but no one on ABTF has ever suggested I should wear a 'supertight' 28 band.
By the way, I do agree with you that 'reverse letterphobia' exists, as I've seen enough of examples of it myself, but I don't think ABTF is the hotbed for bad sizing advice that you're implying it is.
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alexad I think you are right, there was a trend several years ago for doctrinaire +0 sizing and it affected ABTF as much as any other locus for brafitting chat or advice, but I have not seen a lot of that lately on ABTF at all. I have seen a resurgence in the past 6 months on Bratabase of women wearing oddly tight bands (people who are not all that squishy, not particularly large cups and are still choosing bands a solid 2-3 inches smaller than their comfy underbust) but I don't have any sense that they got those ideas from ABTF.
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gosh. Can everyone please calm down? this is getting kind of intense!!! I don't hate anyone on here, nor do I deny the existence of literally any bra size, because I have seen so many. (Even 34C :)
lcl0706 uh i already said this but i'm going to reiterate that i wouldn't recommend a 34 band for a 29" ub -- and i haven't ever done so. I got paranoid and checked my history and as I said before, it contains a variety of advice depending on the situation but the majority of it is trying to talk folks out of cups that are too big for them. One reason for that is that a lot of times the other advice is already covered! Instead of saying the same thing twice, I simply upvote and move on. I'd appreciate it if your comments could be less personal. Feels weird in here.
girl333 I'm sorry if any of my suggestions caused you anguish. I don't believe I have done anything to warrant the strong feelings you are putting out in my direction. If you could please take it to a less personal direction that would be great.
alexad I don't hang out on ABTF anymore so it was just a guess. But if you measure 29", in some cases a 30 IS a supertight band. That's because bra sizing is not standardized and some 30s stretch to 33 while others stretch to 27, so that matters more than the number on the label, which is not a measurement of any kind.
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wendybien, I've only been hanging out here and at ABTF for the last few months, and I've received nothing but good advice from the latter particularly, so I guess the +0 storm had passed by the time I joined!
melifish, yes I definitely agree that the label on a bra can be meaningless, so I always go by measurements. I take the approach of wearing a band that's tight enough to stay in place, but no tighter (which I've seen others espouse too). So, I wear a variety of 30 and 32 bands, depending on how tight or stretchy they are. I've found I'm most comfortable in a stretched band length of around 31 inches (anything looser and it starts shifting around), so that's what I aim for, whatever band size it might state on the label.
I must admit - coming from a background of wearing an ill-fitting 34 or 36A most of my life - that initially I found it hard to judge how tight a well-fitting band should be. And maybe others new to proper bra fitting feel the same, resulting in a tendency to err too much the other way, into bands that are tighter than really necessary.
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Absolutely true but it is not just newbies. Some people are just stoic and don't care much if it feels tight, or indeed actively enjoy the sensation of compression (which is why they may also get into corsets and such). So it makes intuitive sense to them to select bands that fit in that super-tight way because they figure, (a) there's all this stuff online about how snug is best and (b) it feels great so how could something that feels so "right" be a problem?!
Conversely other people have an almost phobic-level sensory aversion to anything snug around the ribs so they will go in the opposite direction and will be strongly committed to bands that are way loose, because this is what feels comfortable around their torso (though it may cause great discomfort on the shoulders etc. especially with a heavy bust).
Unfortunately most bras are designed to work at a specific band tension and if it's being stretched a lot more or a lot less than what the designer had in mind, many fit problems crop up. Until someone invents a truly full-bust-worthy stick-on bra or revamps stays in such a manner as to make them popular again, band sizing will remain a sticking-point for a lot of people who are at odds with the fit norms designers have in mind.
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Hating on is an expression@melifish I don't know how you are too old for that. It's an old expression. Too closed minded maybe. You all have treated me far worse than I have you. I was providing insight as to why you get down voted and you proceeded to attack me. You claim I'm treating you awful, but you're ganging up on me. lcl0706 has made two bralettes for me so she is the most qualified to say if I'm in the wrong band. I feel sorry for your customers because you truly don't understand small band sizes or flaired ribcages which are common in small bands. Also too high of a gore is a problem with pectus carinatum not just too small a band. You'd know that if you cared half as much as you pretend to. There are pictures of me in a Cleo 28 band. The wires "curve" just like Comexim because I have pectus carinatum and excatavum. You can see my rib flares visually, so how it isn't obvious as the cause blows my mind. I'm 5'7" 110 and wear a 0/00. I have a 24" UB if I can't wear a 26" band who can. Oh I know no one in your crazy warped world of everyone is in too small a band and too large a cup. Your hateful comments create body image issues.
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I am just totally baffled at how you got all that from the overall quite mild exchange that occurred on that Comexim fitting thread girl333 . In fact, at the first indication that her comments had offended you she backed off with a comment to the effect that "it's your body and I haven't even fitted you in person so if you think I'm wrong so be it." I just feel you are extrapolating wildly from her actual comments to you, which although I did not even agree with them at the time, were really not so incredibly out there. She was suggesting a band that you had marked as stretching to 27" might be too snug and on that thread you had your comfortable UB marked as 26". TONS of people need more than +1 especially if they are very lean so it was not outlandish or discriminatory of her to say that IMO. Was it incorrect, yes, I think so as you and I discussed later especially due to your ribcage shape that we talked about, and also since you are now saying your body measurements in that table were incorrect (it says 25 tight, 26 comfy, 27 loose whereas you now say you are 24" which I assume is 24 comfy).
But there is a huge difference between an honest mistake and mean nasty prejudice, which is what you are reading into her posts, quite wrongly I believe.
Link to the thread for posterity
http://www.bratabase.com/troubleshoot/did94/ -
wendybien ive said I measured wrong because of my rib flairs & a fractured collarbone before. It would be one thing if it was an honest mistake based partially on my incorrect measurements at the time. However, her going out of the way to prove I'm in too small of a band is my problem. I'm not angry about that specific post. You're missing the point. She always says your band is too small and the cup too big on almost every post. Sometimes that's the case, but when you seek out so called reverse letterophobia to that extent. She also said on here again that the curvature of the bra wires on me is not normal and indicates a too small a band. 28& even 32" bands from VS curve like that on me because of my rib flairs. I have a very narrow frame& extreme rib flairs. The narrow Comexim wires aren't actually narrow on me. I have to bend them more narro sometimes. Again all of my bras the wires curve back until I physically bend them to make them more narrow if need be.
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so if it's not that post that upset you, where did she post something mean to you "trying to prove you're in too small a band" that inspired your first angry post on this page? I feel I am missing something here.
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wendybien that original post did upset me. She also went further on this post to say I was in too small of a band. You know the initial post upset and confused me because you were quite helpful to me after that post. You even said that I looked very narrow and were not surprised I found the 26" bands more comfortable. My first post was the same as yours...defending a friend
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I could tell you were a bit frustrated on that post but had NO idea you had taken it so incredibly personally. This is on a whole other level than what I realized at the time. I just saw it as a normal disagreement where you got exasperated, which obviously happens a lot to lots of people on lots of threads without it being a big personal thing.
And I'm not defending melifish because we're friends... I mean it's not like we're enemies but seriously we barely ever even talk to each other!
I just felt I had to speak up because I think you guys have built her up in your minds as the big bad wolf--all because you don't like her fit advice. Not liking her advice or her school of thought is 100% FINE, I just don't see the point of taking it to such lengths and reading SO much malice into someone just plain having different ideas. And then accusing her of having prejudice or of focusing on slim women is just BANANAS. If you all are small band folks yourselves then those are probably the fit threads you notice the most but I can guarantee you she participates a ton on large band threads as well. She does not come on here to persecute thin women with small ribs!!!
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wendybien that's a good point that we probably notice small band threads more. So naturally we notice the you're in too small a band comments. I never thought about it that way and now I feel like a jerk. My feelings were hurt because I've mentioned before I struggled with anorexia. So her comments were basically calling me fat in my mind. Not to mention I was so confused because every band bigger didn't work for me. So I felt hopeless and lost after her comments. I'm actually small boned like a slightly smaller Marilyn Monroe I fluctuate between 34-35"-23-24-33-34" so my body type alone has generated hate. My flaired ribs and smal ribcage aren't a common body frame. It's all I'm used to so I'm naturally defensive. I also am loyal and will defend my friends to the end. I do think melifish is more biased towards reverse letterophobia but I understand more now. I have the same bias in the opposite direction. Thanks for the insight
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I am very sorry you've struggled with an eating disorder and body dysmorphia. I think that you are right and that it definitely can explain why you had a distorted perception of what was said. Also the norm in brafitting is actually to recommend adding more inches for comfort for people who are very lean, so if anything her comments reflected the opposite of what you thought (her logic was informed by her perception that you had zero padding on your ribs, not that you were fat--a fluffier person can more easily afford to do +0 or +1 in many cases).
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Obviously, I don't have it out for anyone. I have never made so much as an off-color remark about anyone's body, and I never would. I'm just on here trying to help. girl333 I'm sorry about your problems, but that does not give you an excuse to be an asshole (I don't think 'jerk' quite covers it) and make shit up about me.
lcl0706 what have i ever done to you? I don't think I've ever even contradicted your fit advice, which (BELIEVE ME) I disagree with as strongly as you do mine (IMO you consistently wear and advocate cups that are too big to provide optimal support).
I have really thought about this a lot in the last couple days, and I've come to realize y'all are right -- I DO have an ulterior motive in reiterating my unpopular opinions time and time again instead of keeping them to myself, which would be more peaceful. Besides the fact that, based on my experience, I think I'm right that folks would find a better and more comfortable fit in the sizes I recommend, it is this: the idea that neither your band size nor your cup size are related to your worth as a human being or even your physical beauty. It is NOT AN INSULT to tell someone they should be in a 30 band instead of a 28. That's not just because 30 is still a very small band size, but because being in a smaller band size doesn't make you prettier or even thinner! (as Wendy and I have both said several times in this thread alone, rather the opposite for the latter). It is not an insult to tell someone they should be in a DD instead of an F, because there is nothing more beautiful about an F cup than a DD. If we can't respect the idea that humans come in a true multitude of sizes then we might as well just stay in the matrix. girl333, no one EVER insinuated you were fat nor ever would, but (and I realize, without wanting to sound patronizing, that this might be a new idea to you) it is also not an insult to say that someone is fat, because there is nothing wrong with being fat. I'm fat. So are lots of other people. It is not an insult to say that someone has small breasts, either: many do. If your bra size is tied up with your self worth, it is probably best not to advise others about what size to wear.
wendybien I do appreciate you defending me even though we disagree 60% of the time. Everyone else: where were you while a member of the community was being straight up bullied? It's cool, I'll see myself out. There's no reason for me to stay where I'm not welcome.
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I really hope you will reconsider leaving melifish . I know it feels very hurtful to be ganged up on and accused of all manner of wackiness but I would encourage you to consider this whole business, though obviously upsetting, only reflects the views of, basically, 1 person who has bravely admitted that it was actually her own emotional difficulties that caused her to completely misconstrue your advice, plus a TINY handful of other posters who have their knickers in a twist because they don't agree with your overall approach. That's, what, 2% of the usually active posters on this site? Please don't let them be the boss of you, especially when they may have been taking the poster's word for it and didn't even go to see the thread that started it all to see for themselves.
I know it stings to see a nasty, personal attack post about you upvoted but please please try to keep it in perspective. I've had more upvotes on a post telling me I was a condescending, long-winded know-it-all (the 30-50% truth of which does not justify a personal attack righ!?) t:-P
I think as a whole the community really appreciates someone with your real-life brafitting experience being willing to contribute and as often as our views on specific fit threads may diverge, I really believe it would be a great loss if you stopped offering info and advice. Please think also about the large band newbies who often come here and have fitting threads that languish with ZERO advice or interest until someone like you comes along with suggestions of brands to try and designs suitable to address their fit needs. True, you're not the only one with depth of knowledge and expertise in that size range but there are not many and I can literally count the others on the fingers of one hand.
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Really melifish you feel ganged up and hurt and I was the jerk. No look in the mirror. I'm the one that wound up ganged up on. You do constantly say a band is too big and the cup is to small and it's as annoying and rude as you are. Sometimes it's necessary yes. My feelings were hurt by you said, but I still stand by what I said. I tried to explain to you what everyone else's problem with you is and YOU took it the wrong way. If you can't admit that you're not always right and will defend yourself to he death then good riddance. You still can't see how you were wrong with me and accuse me of attacking you when I wasn't. I explained what people's problem is with you and where LCL was coming from.
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melifish, I know I'm only a bystander in all this, but I'd like to second what wendybien has said. Please don't feel driven away, and please don't assume that girl333 speaks for everyone in this community. I actually have no opinion on your fit advice, and I certainly don't have a problem with you, as this thread is the first time we have crossed paths. I only spoke up earlier as I wanted to correct a misapprehension about ABTF, and I had no other agenda. I'm sure that sometimes your advice is right, and sometimes it's wrong, but I can't see any evidence that you have ever spoken out of malice. And I think you've conducted yourself very reasonably in this exchange. Anyway, I do believe that it's healthy for different perspectives to be represented, otherwise a community such as this can develop a very narrow vision, and that's why I'd urge you to reconsider walking away.
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It is beautiful - I've been wanting this color for a long time. I might try the Freya Arabella next - it's a similar look, but I have no idea how it fits.