Bra frustration - Trying a lot of bras will get you nowhere
*warning* very ranty post ahead
I tried like 100 bras over the past year. Only a few fitted me and among those who fitted me where some that didn't fit me but I was not aware. And among these were some that were not comfy to wear (Ariza fabric) or some that I was in the wrong size all along.
So ... overall I found like 3-4 bras „good“ when they fitted me. Andorra and Ariza (if the fabric would be different but look at the epic support : http://www.flickr.com/photos/96373516@N07/9441168427/in/set-72157634444233301) Caitlyn and Bellise (on which sadly cups are too shallow) and in a size 30J some Cleos like Alexa or Meg were good fits.
I spent ridiculous amount on postage, return postage and on bras that I was to lazy to sent back / or missed the return date. (On a positive note: gladly I could sell some of them here, and please take a look at my listings: http://www.bratabase.com/profile/3a1/listings/)
I am currently more frustrated than ever. I have like 2 bras that are wearable for everyday wear. Emphasis on wearable. They are not prefect. But still better than anything I tried during the past months when size change and weight gain forced me to try new bras in bigger sizes. I feel bad about myself because I don't fit into the pretty popular bras. I feel like I have to loose weight. I don't want to diet. The bras made me feel like I have to. I did not even wanted to go to a local bra fitter that fits into bras from A-K cup because she wanted me to try and 34J Andorra, which I know is like 2-3 cups too small.
One bra that I tried in like 3 sizes because everyone loves it and I thought I have to fit into it too, is: Cleo Marcie (6831) , the bra from hell. It looks good. I get a super round cleo shape in it. However It feels terrible. The bra does nothing, like nothing than cover my boobs in their somewhat natural projected (a bit less wide though) shape.
The band does nothing. The Wires do nothing. When I wear the bra strapeless it's obvious that it does nothing.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/96373516@N07/9421467296/in/set-72157634899604276
When I put up the straps, I feel all the weight on them. They are the only thing that holds up boobs in this bra.
Everyone tells me: „but it does look good on you“ So that means I should like it? I should wear it? And torture myself in a bra that causes me neck pain when I wore it for only 5 minutes?!
Also I feel self conscious about the shape I get under clothing. Again. Shouldn't I love it because everyone says it looks good? No. I feel terrible in it. I don't think I would leave the house in that bra after I saw it's whole terribleness on my pictures. It makes my boobs appear bigger. Something I hate. Marcie is a maximizer.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/96373516@N07/9418619843/in/set-72157634899604276
http://www.flickr.com/photos/96373516@N07/9418619771/in/set-72157634899604276/
It is obvious that the Marcie is not constructed with my size in mind. So why did I try it?
Because I wanted to try pretty fashion bras too. I wanted to try it because it was popular and everybody was like: it's awesome...
Cleo bras are not made for sizes above a 30J and sister sizes up in my opinion.
I have similar issues with Panache Jasmine (6951) , though Jasmine has at least a band that does give a bit of the support, that it should.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/96373516@N07/9442632122/in/set-72157634895019099
If I hook it on tightest set of hooks, a Jasmine 32K is wearable for like 4-5 hours. Also the shape is less maximizing than on Marcie.
Also I feel less „passionate“ about bra fitting in general. I don't feel like I have to come to bratabase a lot anymore. I don't feel like talking about it a lot.
New SS14 collection that would get me terrible excited are now to me like: „yes pretty.“ but I don't believe in finding a good bra anymore and being excited for new models and collections. They mostly don't learn and still produce bras for the masses and grade the J-K cup sized up from the middle sizes.
You cannot put the same weak band on a 32K than on a 32D?! (Of course all sizes deserve better bands! But the bigger cup sizes „need“ it!)
I am impressed by Parfait by Affinitas Charlotte, that has a 4 hook closure, thick straps and high wings. This is exactly what I need.
Old Alisa would have jumped in and ordered it like yesterday. All in the hope that this bra can be the one...
New Alisa has it on her Ebay watch-list but does not order it.
I don't believe in it. Also I fear the padding will give me a maximized look.
Anyway what I wanted to say: you can try tons of bras and shop all the time. Of course. But in my case it did not made me happy, it did not bring me perfect bras that fit, it did not help my with my body issues it rather made them worse.
What it brought me: Money loss, feeling like a big supporter of postal services here and in UK, frustrations when bras did not fit, frustration about ridiculous custom fees.
Positive things were: I learned a lot about what works and what does not work. I learned about bra construction. I could try bras and get an image on how they fit. (if I feel like it will probably review some in the future but now I am too negative I think)
So what I am going to do? Focus more on other topics apart from bra fitting in general and try some more Elomi bras. I might stock up on Caitlyns, if there is nothing else. And look boring and old fashioned in them. Who cares? I like the minimized look I get in 34JJ - Elomi » Caitlyn Underwire Side Support (8030) .
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There'd be this option to choose if it should be a balconette, plunge, full cup and etc, and you would be able to choose the straps and so on 
Bras suck. I wish I could magically point you to one that didn't suck for you.
I am do sad to hear this :( No one ever said bras bring happiness. Well fitted bras (and clothes) however do help us accept our bodies because in them we don't feel like freaks anymore. You've been through this once before and you did get out of it a winner. I think this frustration is coming from the fact you feel you need to go through that difficult process again to accept your new size. Don't get discouraged. I know you can do it with or without a little help from the bras, and I have no doubt you'll find some you like.
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